Newfound Purpose
by Simantov
Summary: Having weak resolution doesn't mean someone can't be brave enough to save the life that sacrificed for themselves. Yuma/Cynthia. Warning: Will be rated M later for a girl/girl sex scene.


Wew! So hi again! This is my first Claymore fanfic and I hope to be not the last one! I hope you have all seen this great anime too! I really loved it.  
>So this is it. Forgive me for any grammatical or tense errors, it's not betaed.<p>

**Disclaimer:** The characters and the manga scene is not mine, it is owned by Norihiro YAGI.

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><p>This was just none sense!<p>

Why did she have to do it? Why for me?

Her rank is so far above mine and yet she shielded me against this lethal strike. Shielded me with her own body, with her own life at stake. She's of more importance in the team than I…then why did she…?

I was trying my best to run away with her in my arms, or what was left of her. Damn it! My breathing was ragged, I was so tired and my muscles ached. Even if we are Claymores that doesn't mean that we are invulnerable. But the only thing that kept me going was her.

Not even my own life mattered to me anymore. She was injured and I had to bring her to a safe place to check her wounds.

A dull sound reached my ears, as I recognized that her remaining arm dropped to the messed rocky floor.  
>Shit!<br>With all my strength and speed I reached a safe place, the rocky floor intact from the powerful attack that the Awakened Beth unleashed, and protected by a tall rocky cliff behind us.

I deposited her carefully on the floor and the sight left me breathless…but not enough to stop me from calling out to her.

"Cynthia! Cynthia! Get a hold of yourself, Cynthia!" I couldn't even recognize my voice…it sounded just too desperate.

Of course it was; her eyes were closed. What if she…? No. She can't be…  
>The rocky floor where I put her was instantly colored with her blood; too much blood…! And just from one blow from that monster. I should have ignored that youki. We should have just escaped when she told me that something was wrong.<p>

I was having a dilemma in my head when a little relief washed through me, as I notice those pretty big silver eyes that showed through her long blond eyelashes focused on mine.

"Yuma-san…Are you alright?..." And she just had to ask me that! Anger boiled up once more inside me, but I needed to keep her awake. I needed to keep her with me. I noticed in her soft high-pitched voice and her look that she was so tired or drowsy.

"You idiot! The one who isn't alright is you! Why did you do that?" I screamed my lungs out at her. I just couldn't hold it in anymore. I didn't care if she was my superior or not.

But I think that made it, as it brought her out of her stupor. The only inconvenience was that she for the first time, noticed her surroundings and her body…but I couldn't stop her. She needed to know…

"Ahh… I…" Just watching her battered body, made me feel helpless…and made a knot in my throat. Also for the first time, I noticed my position. I was straddling her, with both my arms next to her head holding my weight on them. But that wasn't the matter. That wasn't, because she also noticed that she couldn't feel my thighs, because…

"All my limbs and…a part of my internal organs were lost, weren't they…" She just had to say it in that soft voice…like she didn't care at all. The anger I felt before didn't dissipate, so I roared at her again, but this time regret was mixed in my voice.

"Why did you have to go that far…using yourself as a shield to protect me! That…" But before I was even finished, she answered back with her same sweet voice, effectively stopping me from anything more I was about to say.

"I'm sorry; It's a force of habit…My body moves on its own…" And she smiled at me… She was the first Claymore comrade to ever smile at me this sweetly; this honestly. No one ever cared enough for me…number forty.

That fueled even more this feeling of shame and helplessness, that I couldn't stop the pouring of my tears. I just had to cry in front of her! But warriors must not cry. I didn't even want to be something like this, but I just had to accept it once it happened. But all this time I couldn't. Not even now, that I have a comrade dying in my arms. I shouldn't be worth of her sacrifice! I shouldn't even be worth of being a Claymore!

So the last thing I could answer her was: Shit, with my stupid wavering voice...

We stayed like that in silence for a few seconds. For me it was eternity. It looked like she was thinking or pondering about something. Her deep silver eyes watching my miserable tear-stained face…until she spoke.

"I'm sorry. That's not right. I may have wished for this to happen."

"Wha…What?" I didn't understand. What was she talking about? Did she have a death wish or something?

"On that day, seven years ago…I lost Captain Veronica right before my eyes." "But even then I am different from the Captain in one thing… In reality, the two of us were the ones who drew out the troop." "But Captain Veronica alone was killed…At that time, I too was unable to land a single blow on the enemy, but still survived with mere luck." "Since then I've felt empty. The reason I have come this far with everyone is also to settle things…perhaps I've only come to seek a place to die."

"Cynthia…you…" You felt that same hole in your soul… That was I wanted to say. I felt it too all this time since that same day seven years ago. The helplessness…of not being strong enough to protect your comrades, of watching them die before your eyes without even screaming. Without even saying how much you appreciate them…or a goodbye...

"Yuma-san…could you please kill me…?" I wasn't expecting that. At least not with the same sweet smile plastered on her delicate young features. The request made me straighten my back, unable to feel comfortable with being this close to her.

"Though I may be a defensive type, there is no way I could regenerate like this." "I'm also slowly losing consciousness and I don't know when it'll be gone completely." "I can't bear the pain at this point. I might go berserk…" "Among the seven people who survived, I'm the one with the weakest will. To have been able to use my life for another's sake is enough…"

What? Not those words… I'm tired of those words. They seem like a death sentence.

Is this the destiny of a Claymore? To always suffer from the very beginning? Even I can't accept that Cynthia. I'm the weak here! I'm supposed to be the one with the weakest resolve in this team not you! And I just can't accept it!

Seventeen comrades died back then in the Frozen Lands of Pieta as well as something in all of our hearts. Our comrades, our friends. The only good things that had remained back then, from this duty that was forced upon us without our approval and mercy, disappeared in those damned lands.

All those wishes, dreams and hopes now long gone. And now WE are here…the only seven survivors and from all the people, you asking me to end your life when we have been through real hell?

You're not the only one who has felt this way, Cynthia. You're not the only one…

And I'm not going to lose any other comrade in front of my eyes anymore. My life isn't worth of your sacrifice! I won't let anyone else sacrifice themselves for me anymore!

If you have a weak resolve, then I'm going to force a stronger one in you! If you can't believe in anything or anyone anymore, then I'm going to make you believe in me!

With newfound strength I punched the rocky floor next to her head. I just couldn't take that and I wanted her to know it. I don't care if I broke my hand in the process. Physical wounds can just heal later.

"Don't…don't flick with me…" She looked surprised by my outburst.

"To have your comrades die in front of you…do you think you're the only one who's in pain…?"

Damn it. I just had to cry again. I'm such a crybaby, and having also to wet her face with my tears…  
>I hope that makes her feel ashamed for what she just had said.<p>

I also wanted to ask her: What would that Veronica say to you, if she was to hear your words a moment ago?

Right now the only thing I could do with all this desperation was to regenerate her body myself. Less talk and more action, if not, she would end up dying from mass bleeding or awakening.

So I held my left wrist with my right hand and positioned them above her chest without touching her. She seemed to understand right away what I was trying to do.

"Yuma-san…?"

Then, I closed my eyes, clenched my teeth, and began to flow my youki through her.

"I learned how to synchronize youki together when you restored my left leg. This time, it's my turn." I told her with a husky voice. I just heard her gasp.

"But…but that's…being able to do it after just seeing it…besides…" Ku! Again with those kind of thoughts! And to think she was the most optimistic one from the team. But being able to see her this open and vulnerable just with me, makes me feel...something I just didn't think of before...

"SHUT UP!" Shit! I wasn't supposed to roar at her again. It's just that these thoughts about her... Grr! I need to think of an excuse, I can feel she's quite surprised too by this unnecessary scold.

"I'll get distracted…I'm begging you, Just keep silent for now…" Nice one Yuma. To think I would resort to this. Okay, but now is not time for thinking about this, now is time for saving her.

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><p>Time went by.<p>

At first she was tense…and was having some trouble synchronizing our youki together, but as time passed it was easier and I felt she relaxed considerably. Good. That was what I wanted…for her to believe in me. If Claire could do miracles then I could do too.

Everything was calm and quiet. I could only caught the faint sound of debris being carried away by the wind, and her soft deep breathing.

Cynthia was asleep. I could feel it even without opening my eyelids.

Meanwhile, I still had my bare teeth clenched, trying to flow more youki and concentrate it on her left arm without me reaching my limit.

I already made space for her legs to grow again. I could now feel her tights with my own.

Ahh…not again with these thoughts! What are these…? Just by being close to her...  
>Shit! My youki synchronization failed at making her left hand! I need to concentrate!<p>

I opened my eyelids so I could see the outcome about her left wrist, but accidentally was greeted with a breathtaking scene…

Cynthia just laid there peacefully…with her eyes closed and a smile on her face. Her little silky blonde hairs sticking on her forehead from the perspiration that gathered when she was handling the pain. Her braids framing her young delicate features, features of a young woman around her early-twenties, possibly younger than me. She looked so pretty…and cute…

Wha…what?

I've never thought of someone else being pretty, not even a Claymore! I didn't even thought of myself being pretty. I just dressed the way I felt comfortable, and I liked long hair because of my mother. But I never really thought of myself or somebody else with some…sexual tendency?

"Aa-ah! I know now where this is going!" I blurted it out! I quickly lifted my hands to my mouth scared that I would wake her up. To my relief she was still sleeping deeply.

Damn! This is so embarrassing! To think of that kind of things with my upperclassman and in these kind of moments…! I...I have never really felt this way before. Everything that revolved around my world was always battle, blood, monsters and swords. Feelings didn't mattered much even in those times in the organization as a trainee. Not even friendship, because rank was always the priority we should had in mind. Or that was what they would tell us...

But first, I just need to regenerate her completely. Maybe later I'll...I'll figure out what is this...because is not just some friendship. Do friends have in mind how beautiful are each other, or the way they feel when you touch them...?

I positioned my arms again and used my youki one more time closing my eyes so I could not look at her.

At last, I finished a couple of minutes later with greater effort than before, but believing for the first time, that I could prevent myself from reaching my limit.

I ended so exhausted; I could barely keep my eyes opened, so letting out a sigh of relief, I crawled to the rocky cliff so I could rest my body a bit over there, and I stole a last glance at my miracle.

A smile grazed to my lips.

"I managed to keep you alive..." And with that I closed my eyes, not to fall asleep but to concentrate more on any weird noises that would want to hurt us again.

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><p><strong>A.N: <strong>So I hope you all have enjoyed it. I openly accept for comments and critics. :)

'Till next time!


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